Why am I shy?
Think what the reasons may be? The most common causes are rooted in culture and upbringing, or religious education. If you can identify the origin of your shyness, you can then use critical thinking to reason and overcome preconceptions and understand the false knowledge associated with it. You will then become free of the perceived moral constraints which are holding you back.
Shyness is not a mental condition
Unlike social anxiety which is an enxiety disorder, shyness is not a mental health issue. Understanding the difference is important: social anxiety is a fear of rejection and disapproval, while shyness is simply discomfort in social settings.
Challenge Your Thinking
- People don’t notice that you are shy until you show them! You think everyone is judging your every move. But most people are too busy with their own things to notice the quiet one in the room. They only notice it when they engage with you.
- Switch from cautious mode to positive mode! Instead “Can I do this?”, switch to “I can do this”. Don’t question yourself if you can, or should.
- Engage and take the initiative! Get social with like-minded people. It is easier to engage conversation on subjects you share common interests.
- Don’t doubt and think so much! Instead of thinking back about what you did or said, think forward about what you will do or say next.
- Identify your strengths and weaknesses. Do you feel less shy with strangers, or with people you already know? These are your strengths. Oddly enough, put more effort toward the situations you already feel stronger about. This will build up your confidence to attack your weaknesses.
- The power of "I Don't Know". Being able to say that you don’t know something shows strength, objectivity, and openness to talk about something. Expressed with positive body language, it can lead to engaging conversations.
- Body language talks! Use it to your advantage. Calm and confident, making welcoming eye-contact opens up people and help you feel secure and confident.
Shyness does not define you. It is a behavior that you can change in time. It will not happen overnight, keep your focus on your goal, and don't be afraid to put yourself out there!